While You’re Waiting…

I remember being in so much angst and praying for God to send me a man to help… Help with lifting something, help with being lonely, help with financial problems… There were nights I went to bed so discouraged, so tired, that I just wanted to cry. Being single is a stage where we are toughened, but it is also a stage where we are strengthened.  Amen?

Out of all of my “single problems,” I think the only one He was truly concerned with was that I could get really lonely. Just as He saw Adam alone and said that it wasn’t good for him to be alone, this is true for us today.  So through some great God-incidents, He brought me to an AWESOME church family where I had fun, met friends and started serving others. Everything else just started falling into place.

So I URGE you… Don’t just sit around waiting for Mr. Right on his shining steed to swoop in and make your life better… If you’re sad or lonely or broke… give!  Give of your time, of your money.  Give your help, your shoulder, using your spiritual gifts, GIVE! If you’re having financial problems, God promises to take care of you. He WILL provide. That’s HIS promise, not mine!

My sweet, sweet sisters. Do not give up on God. Do not give up on waiting for His very best for you. Think of one small thing you can do for someone else today that will help them in some way and DO it! You may not come out wiser or wealthier, but you’ll come out a winner and you’ll be amazed that YOU may be the one smiling!

Remember, to whom much is given, much is expected (Luke 12:48).  You may not feel that you’ve been given much and maybe you haven’t, but you are here for a special purpose.  Find your spiritual gift and use it!

If you don’t know what your spiritual gift(s) is/are, this is an amazing spiritual gift website that I’ve used many times over the years.  It’ll take you about 45 minutes, but it’s so worth it!  I’d love your feedback, ladies!  Here’s the link:  http://www.kodachrome.org/spiritgift/

God bless and Happy Valentines Day.  You are loved with a love so great, that you were purchased with the price of a life.  Wow.  You must be pretty special!


A Valentines Prayer

So it’s Valentine’s Weekend.  Are you going to go into a depression or are you going to thank God that He’s in control?  He knows what He’s doing in your life!  Trust Him.  He knows the plans that He has for you.  Trust Him.  He knows every hair on your head.  Trust Him.  He’s known you before you were in your mother’s room.  Trust Him.

Father, I lift every heart who reads this to You.  You know the weight they carry and nothing, nothing, nothing surprises You.  May every eye lift to You, may each soul reading this feel Your comfort.  For You and You alone can give us that peace that truly does surpass all understanding.  We thank you, Father, for who You are.

It’s in your son’s name that we pray.


Crying in The Attic

I have a couple of “crying in the attic” stories, but after praying, I think this is the one God wanted me to share.

After years of struggle, I was finally blessed to buy my own home.  It wasn’t much, but it was mine, needed repairs and all.  One Sunday afternoon, it was storming outside and I was in my bedroom getting ready for Sunday night Bible Study. I just happened to look up and there was a brown water mark. My heart fell as I realized that there was no water pipe that went over that ceiling. With dread, I pulled down the attic ladder and started climbing. Immediately I heard the water. I turned my eyes reluctantly to the source of the sound and there was a golf-ball size hole in the plywood beneath the shingles. Water was just pouring in.

I started crying as I went to find a bucket. I was broke, but I couldn’t have this hole in my roof! I was so scared… and MAD! I brought the bucket up and fixed some boards to hold it and then I just lost it. I started screaming at God! “You PROMISED to take care of me! I don’t have a husband. I don’t have anyone to turn to. Your Word PROMISES to take care of me! How could you let this happen?” I was sobbing. If anyone was outside, they were probably wondering what was louder, my wailing or the storm’s!

I sat up there for about 10 minutes crying, feeling sorry for myself and then trying to remember a person’s number that I had served with in the Youth Ministry. His name was Lester. I climbed down from the attic and storm started letting up, which was a relief. I started looking for Lester’s number. It had been so long! I searched my emails. I searched my cell phone. It had been a couple of years since I’d talked to him. “Oh well,” I decided. I might as well go to Bible Study.

I was so disheartened. I walked into Bible Study and guess who was there? Yep. It was Lester! We talked and he came out to my house the next day. I was prepared to pay him in increments. He had to replace the whole board and all of the shingles. He wouldn’t accept a penny from me. As I thanked him, he said, “Thank God, not me. I just did what He told me to do.” Let it be known that I had never seen Lester in that Bible Study before or since!

Of course I had some apologizing to do. I know now, that this was a faith-building exercise. One of many. As the years went on and these “things” would happen, I gradually learned to just know I would be taken care of. He promises us that in Matthew 6:25-34

25 Therefore I say unto you, be not anxious for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than the food, and the body than the raiment?    26 Behold the birds of the heaven, that they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; and your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are not ye of much more value then they?    27 And which of you by being anxious can add one cubit unto the measure of his life?    28 And why are ye anxious concerning raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:
29 yet I say unto you, that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
30 But if God doth so clothe the grass of the field, which to-day is, and to-morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?    31 Be not therefore anxious, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?    32 For after all these things do the Gentiles seek; for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.    33 But seek ye first his kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.   34 Be not therefore anxious for the morrow: for the morrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

Fireworks or a Slow-burning Bonfire?

How many times have you met a man and the sparks were just shooting back and forth? You felt you could hardly breath and he actually approaches you and your heart feels like it’s going to burst? It’s the fireworks! The endorphins are working overtime and you can see in his eyes that he feels the same way.  Isn’t this what you’ve been waiting for?  Or is it?  I have a hard question here…

When you think of fireworks, you think of beauty, explosions, earth-shaking vibrations.  But if you think about it, they’re over fairly quickly.  They kind of leave a dust in the wind, and then they’re just a memory.  So, here’s the question:  Would you rather have the fireworks that are over fairly quickly and leave your heart bruised and your self-esteem shattered or would you rather have a small little ember that looks kind of interesting and if you nurture it, it actually becomes a fire and if you nurture THAT, it becomes a bonfire that will last “until death do us part?”

Is Your Love Strong Enough? (Is His?)

You know that I’m constantly telling you to guard you heart, listen to your mind, go with what you know…  Allow me to give you a hypothetical situation.

Say you meet a guy and the sparks are FLYING!  Eventually you have sex and you even end up married.  You may even have a baby or two.  And then the unthinkable happens!  He’s hurt and ends up in a wheel chair.  He has no functions below the waist.  Sex is out of the question.  Because you’ve been married for a while, the sparks had already settled down and the kids have definitely put a damper on the romance department.  Here are the tough questions:

Can you honor your vows, “for better or for worse?”  Can you entertain each other with your wits and conversation?  Would your actions speak always of the deep love you have?  Is he an honorable man that you can look at him with absolute love and honor him with your devotion?  Was sex just the icing on the cake or was it the whole dessert?

Now let’s flip the situation.  You’re married and have kids and YOU are the one who ends up in the wheelchair.  Does your love run strong enough and deep enough for him to take care of you and not have sex?  Or would you be worried that this man will “need” sex so badly that he’ll have another woman on the side?  Or even leave you stranded with the kids?  (I’ve seen it happen.)  Or even, take the kids and leave you high and dry?

Is your love deep enough to stay true to each other?  Can your marriage handle the financial and emotional strain?

There is only one way to find out before the scenario could ever happen.  Take sex “off the table” as part of your dating habits.  God knows what He’s doing when He asks us to not have sex outside of marriage.  This is just one scenario that COULD happen and it’s very scary.  Can you ignore the “sparks” and look deeper into the character of the man who’s caught your eye?  What about YOU?  Can you look deeper into yourself and know that you have the character to rise to this occasion?  If the answer is no to either, then let’s save the divorce statistics!  Don’t marry someone you can’t rely on and don’t get married until you know you would be able to give that much of yourself to the marriage.

You are loved, SO loved by our Holy Father.  Honor Him, sisters.  Honor Him with your bodies

Romans 12:1–2

    I appeal to you therefore, brothers,by the mercies    of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and    acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do    not be conformed to this world,but be transformed by the renewal of    your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God,    what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Are You Being Yourself or The Woman You Think He Wants?

Remember the, movie, “The Runaway Bride, where Richard Gere accuses Julia Roberts of not even knowing what kind of eggs she likes? Her favorite breakfast was whatever the last boyfriend liked.  Aren’t most of us like that in one way or another?We pretend we like football, hockey, soccer, scuba diving (when we’re terrified of the water), etc. etc.

The problem is that we can be such great fakers that once we get married, we’re faced with a choice: Stop faking and let him know that he married a fraud, or put up with his interests (which become more and more grudgingly accepted).  That’s not exactly fair to either one of you, is it?

Many, many of us go into the dating process .and even our marriage thinking I’ll put up with this for right now, but just wait …,”   But that is wrong!  #1 It’s not fair to him. Bottom line, he thinks he’s in love with a totally different woman! #2 Going into a marriage thinking that it’s our job, our mission to make him “see the light,” is going to lead the marriage straight to destruction.  Once your husband realizes that he’s stuck with somebody other than the woman he dated, he’s going to change and you’re going to wonder why!

So my advice, my hope, my prayer for each of you is that you gather the courage to admit if you don’t like something that he does.  Be honest!  You do NOT have to be 100% compatible!  Iron sharpens iron, yes?

If this handsome, interesting, Godly man asks you out to see his favorite sports team, you have a choice:  You can be honest and say something like “Well, I’m not really a “XXX” fan, but I’m willing to give it a try!”  Or “Gee, can I take a rain check?  I’m really not into sports (or whatever the activity is), but I’d love to see you again!”  There. It’s on the table.  He can make the decision if he wants to continue to pursue and he might!  Remember, it is NOT your job to pursue!  (I don’t care what year it is!)  Because of that, we’re tempted to make the “bait” more interesting.  Stop.

Men love a woman who knows what she wants.  You can be that woman without an attitude.  You can be strong and loving,confident and compassionate.  God made you a woman.  He made you unique.  Use that!

And remember that you are a Princess, heir to a thrown and you are loved as far as the East is to the West!

Pending Book Release!

Hello, Godly Women, my new book, “Godly Women Waiting for Godlly Men,” will be available for download and for purchase in the next couple of weeks! I’m very excited, not so much for the sell of the book, (it took me years to write), but I’m praying that any woman who is going through a bad time, whether it’s a divorce or a bad breakup, that she will read about my mistakes and LEARN from them!  If one life can be touched, I would be so honored to know about it!
I’m asking that you like my new Author page, Honey Gilmer and to follow me on Twitter @HoneyGilmer .  I’ll keep everyone updated with the release date.
God bless you and thank you for your support!

If God is Sufficient, Why Do I Want More?

One night, years and years ago I was complaining to God about being lonely and being so tired of going to bed by myself and why after being “good” for so long.  Why wasn’t I being rewarded?  After I listened to myself whine to my Lord and Savior, I felt so GUILTY! How can I tell my God, my Creator… the Creator of my Universe that he’s not enough? Immediately I went to my knees and apologized. My heart was so broken and the guilt was horrible. I cried myself to sleep because I thought I had disappointed God.

That night (or should I say morning… about 1:00 a.m.) I was awoken by the Holy Spirit. God gave me a thought to hold to and to treasure. He’s so loving. #1 I was forgiven for my doubt and discouragement.  #2, He gave me a different twist on an old story…

In the beginning God created the Heavens and earth. He created the animals, the plants and he created Man. Can you imagine… there was Adam and he had God all to himself… I mean it was a PERFECT world and it was a PERFECT relationship… but Adam was still LONELY! Adam desired more and he was a perfect creation in God… so the BEST that I could do was accept the free, unconditional love that God gives me and understand that feeling lonely was OK and nothing to feel guilty over. Just a little food for thought…