This was written by Rick Warren for ALL parents, but I like to try and single out our single moms (and dads) sometimes. Being a single parent is especially stressful. I love what Rick Warren says below. Our kids are gifts from God. They need to be celebrated. It does NOT have to cost a bunch of money… It’s about attitude and gratitude!
People ought to enjoy every day of their lives, no matter how long they live” (Ecclesiastes 11:8a NCV).
“Kids need celebration! That’s just a fancy word for fun. Families ought to have fun! The home should be a place to play. This is a major fault in many, many homes where the parents are basically good parents and are watching out for their kids, but they don’t have enough fun. They’re too busy. They come home with a “to do” list after work is over. All that stuff has to be done, and they just don’t have time for fun.
Do you endure your kids or do you enjoy them? Kids need celebration.
“People ought to enjoy every day of their lives, no matter how long they live” (Ecclesiastes 11:8 NCV).
When my kids were growing up, we had what we liked to call “Daddy’s Magical Mystery Tours.” Periodically, I shook up the whole schedule and said, “Forget the routine; we’re going to go have fun.” I would even wake up the kids in the middle of the night and put them in the car and do something outrageous — on a school night! So what if they miss a day of school? They’re going to remember that event. They’re going to remember when I got them up real early in the morning and let them eat French toast that I colored green.
Have fun with your kids! Enjoy them! No single day out of routine is going to make or break their lives. But a single special event that is crazy and fun will make a memory your kids will never forget.
If you’re not having fun with your kids at home and celebrating, don’t be surprised when they don’t want to spend time at home. If you don’t have fun with your kids and really enjoy them, don’t be surprised when they grow up and move out and don’t want to come back very often.
Don’t just endure your kids. Enjoy them!”
I have many sayings that I like to pop off with every now and then. One of them is, “Trash in, trash out.” In other words, if you watch the dark movies, the profanity-laced movies, you’re going to regurgitate the trash you’ve taken in. Remember the commercials that showed the woman that ate the honeybun and her derriere became a honeybun? That’s the same with what we feed our minds.
If you WANT a godly man (only “l”) you MUST become a godly woman. You must feed your soul; even in your pursuit of entertainment. And I have good news! You have at least two movies coming out to look forward to!
The first, coming out in October, is called “Let There Be Light”.
#2: I can Only Imagine opening Spring of 2018
I just wanted to share these. I CAN’T WAIT!!!
This video is the epitome of how God created Eve to be. Not as a “helpmate…” God created Eve as Adam’s “ezer.” In any situation described in the Bible by this verb, without the helper (ezer), the person who needed the help would have either died or faded away. God bless this couple.
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My husband brought up an interesting point last night. We had attended a class together and the teacher brought up a statistic, saying that in a relationship, men’s #1 need is sex and that it didn’t even register on the top 5 for women! This morning, my husband asked “If it doesn’t register on the Top 5, why do so many women come into a marriage having “known” so many sexual partners?”
My response was…, “Women use sex to get love and men use love to get sex.” His next question was, “But then it’s a lie… they’re using something that isn’t that important to them in order to get a guy. Then when they get married, they’re not as interested after the first few weeks.” BINGO!
It’s the same scenario as I’ve written about in the past: With my first husband, I pretended to love the same sports he did (he was my boyfriend at the time). But after a few years of marriage, I would just find a good book to read while he watched his beloved Cowboys. He was actually hurt when he yelled, “DID YOU SEE THAT?” and I looked up from my book and said, “What?” He was furious with me! And I was furious with him! How dare he get mad that I was reading a book! But… was it really his fault that I had pretended to like the things he liked? I had never looked at the sex-part as the same scenario. God DID mean for sex to be for marriage and marriages need work in every area, even sex. After the first 6 months of any relationship, married or unmarried, the endorphins go away and what’s left matters!
Just from my own experience, since my second (and forever) husband did court me, it was definitely a unique experience NOT to use sex necessarily to get a ring on my finger. All of the dating rules changed! There was no bait & switch. Neither one of us were annoyed that we’d been tricked!
Example: He always opened the door for me when we went on a date and he still does, even if we’re just running to the hardware store. It totally laid down a great foundation for our marriage.
So bottom line? Be yourself. Live by the principals you will want to come first in your marriage.
I hate sounding like an old fogey… like my MOM! Lol But here I am! I remember my high school graduation night in 1976. I was with my best friend. We were dating guys who were each other’s best friends and we were on our way to meet them. I can’t remember the conversation, but I remember saying, “Damn it!” I gasped and put my hand over my mouth. I had stunned myself! My friend was driving and she gasped and looked at me with disbelief.
After that I would use the “D” word sparingly. Once the abuse in my first marriage started, I would use the “F” word as a warning to him and for myself that I had reached the end of my rope. If that word came out of my mouth, it wasn’t because I was about to explode, it meant I was in the middle of an explosion! Was it right? No. Scripture gives us the following verses (among many more):
- Colossians 3:8 ESV ‘But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.”
- Ephesians 4:29 ESV “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
- Matthew 12:36-37 ESV “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
- Matthew 15:10-11 ESV “And he called the people to him and said to them, ‘Hear and understand: it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.'”
- James 3:10 ESV “From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.”
- James 1:26 ESV “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.”
To this day, I still struggle with reaching that level of rage and it’s usually when faced with false accusations or something being totally unfair. I will walk out of the room before allowing myself to use that word. I do NOT want to lose my witness, especially with loved ones… and they’re usually the ones we’re the most comfortable around and allow our mouths to run out of control, right?
Today, I hear 12- and 13-year-olds using the “F” word where I wouldn’t have even used the “D” word at the age of 18. It’s used as an adjective to enhance a verb. So if the worst word in history is being used in mundane conversation, how do we know when anyone has reached the end of their rope? When they pull a gun? When they attempt suicide?
God tells us in his word how He wants His people to talk. In order to attract a Godly man, mustn’t our speech reflect our lives? Shouldn’t our walk be transparent? If we want people to want what we have found in Christ, shouldn’t our speech be pure? Give it a try for a few hours, a few days, a few months and the rest of your lives. God expects it and so does your godly man.
If there was one thing I could do over again after my divorce and before all of my mistakes, it would be to take this class. I urge anyone, man or woman, who has just had the rug pulled from under you emotionally and/or financially (usually they’re together). Get with a friend and split the cost, but DO this program! Call around and see if a local church is hosting it! It’s amazing and I highly recommend it!
#GodlyWomen #FPU #FinancialPeaceUniversity
In John 11:33-35, it says: (33) Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled. (34) And He said, ‘Where have you laid him?’ They said to Him, ‘Lord, come and see.’ (35) Jesus wept.
The first assumption people jump to is that Jesus was sad because his friend died… but that doesn’t make sense, does it?
Have you ever had a friend come to you in deep pain and there was little or maybe nothing you could do, but you looked at them through tears; knowing that their pain was so deep that you grieved for them and with them? I think Jesus wept for the pain of living. He knew he was bringing Lazarus back, didn’t he? He understood the pain of those who were living.
He knows your pain, too sister. Whether you are laying by yourself in a bed and crying, or at a party where everyone’s on a date and you’re smiling and doing your best to enjoy yourself… He sees you. He knows what you’re feeling. Never, ever doubt that. He loves you that much.
Don’t allow doubt to linger. You are loved beyond riches.
I just heard some statistics that I’d like to share with the single Moms.
Sexual Abuse Risks state that:
- For Non-biological married parents (example: step parents) the chance of a child being sexually abused is 9x the normal risk.
- For biological parents who are unmarried, the risk is 5x the normal risk.
- For a single parent (usually the mother) cohabitating with someone, the risk is 20x greater than the normal risk.
- For a single parent, living alone, the risk is 5 x greater than the normal risk.
For myself, I fell into the first bullet point when I was a child. My step-father sexually abused me. So as an unsaved young, single-mom I actually did live with a couple of guys. My heart stops knowing the risk I put my children in. Once I accepted Christ and started attending a true, Bible-believing church, I learned very quickly that the best thing I could do for my kids was to stay unmarried until they were out of the house. I chose to do that and to this day, I’m grateful that I did. I have no regrets that I was single for almost 19 years.
I go into more detail in my book, which is available on Amazon, among other places. My first prayer as a born-again Christian was that God take my mistakes and use them; to please not let my pain go to waste. I’m here to share my mistakes so that at least one person hears. I’ve taken some virtual punches for my stance on abstaining from sex outside of marriage and I’m willing to take the criticisms and the derogatory remarks because somewhere out there, there may be one woman; one single mother; who needs some direction. She’s reeling from a divorce or a bad breakup. I’m here for you and I hear you.
God bless all of you, my sisters. You are loved!
Coming from a woman who spent many Christmases alone, including not being with my children; one estranged and the other was just wrapped up in her own life… I know that this can be a trying time. One year I even went and sat in a bar on Christmas Eve, just to get out of my doldrums. It doesn’t work. #Godlywomen
So what does work? Look around. Do you see one thing you’ve accomplished because God was faithful. There might even be one or two things. For me, God enabled me to buy a small, very inexpensive house. Much of the furniture was bought used, but over the years I was able to buy little things to fix it up… little “cheap” things, but they were mine; bought with my blood, sweat and tears.
For a few years I invited my Bible Study over and we’d get through Christmas Eve together and then I’d find another single girlfriend and go see a movie on Christmas Day. If you’re not involved in a church, this is the perfect time to find one. If there is a single’s Bible Study, get involved; if there’s not one, talk to the pastor! Why wait on someone else? YOU help get one started! Take God out of the box, He’s not there anyway. Ask Him what He wants you do. You have? He’s not answering? Do something… anything until He does tell you. Do something for Him; i.e., volunteer! Eventually He’s going to answer. I promise!
Merry Christmas, my sisters! Remember how much He loves you. Know that you are all on my heart and mind this Christmas season. May God bless you each abundantly. Stay warm (or if you’re in Texas, chill out), drive safely, call a friend if you need to, and thank God for the small things.
The Christian Post had this article and it breaks my heart! Seriously… Sisters, if you are hearing this, remember Isaiah 5:20 says,
“Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness;
Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter!”
If you are looking for an excuse to have “blessed sex” outside of marriage, this woman, who calls herself a pastor tries to say it’s OK. IT IS NOT! Hear my plea, sisters. I’m posting this solely to warn you of what to watch for. This is the Enemy at work
Link to article : Pastor Who Says Single Christians Can Have ‘Mutually Pleasurable’ Sex Doesn’t See Bible as God’s Infallible Word